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SKIN IN THE GAME

The phrase “skin in the game” originated from horse racing. Owners of the racehorses had the most to gain or lose because they had “skin in the game”. Today this phrase is most often used in financial and investment circles. Bankers like to see a large down payment when lending money because the borrower has more “skin in the game”, making it less likely that they would ever have to foreclose. 

In the world of fundraising, donors who make major gifts expect to be informed of progress on stated goals and projects; outcomes and impact are very important for those with substantial “skin in the game”. And it is not just financial skin. Contributing talent and time puts real skin on the financial skin. The combination, or the trifecta gifts of time, talent, and treasure go beyond having “skin in the game”. At this point you are all in, down to the bone. 
 
Jesus said if you want to follow me, pick up your cross – daily. I guess you could say Jesus is asking us to have skin, bone, and soul in the game. Whereas a contract between people requires some skin, a covenant with Christ requires our whole being. Where Moses set out the 10% tithing rule, Jesus gave it all; once and for all. The covenantal relationship joins us with Jesus - just like a marriage. 

Being a disciple, and a member of the Body of Christ, is a covenantal relationship between me and all my brothers and sisters in Christ. Intellectually I can understand the idea of covenant. However, living the covenant from the heart is another matter. There was a time in my life when I thought stewardship was having some “skin in the game”. As I grew closer to Christ, I desired more from our relationship and giving a little skin was not enough. I learned that if I want all of Jesus, I must give all of Gary.

When it comes to the church, I cannot help but think that our stewardship programs center on increasing annual giving rather than increasing Christ in our hearts. We ask people to increase their “skin in the game” while Jesus desires our hearts and souls. Is it any wonder why so many churches are in decline? I wonder how many people left our church because they were seeking a deeper relationship with Jesus and found it in the church down the street? I have heard people bemoan that one of their largest givers left the church. They need that “skin in the game”. Funny, I rarely hear expressions of grief when a prayer warrior moves away. Could it be that our faith is only skin deep? 
© Can Stock Photo / rummess
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 25 May, 2023
"If you cannot find Christ in the beggar at the church door you will not find him in the Chalice". St. John Chrysostom This quote – a mere 1650 years old, give or take 10 years, is worth a lifetime of reflection. What jumps out is the connection and juxtaposition between the beggar at the church door, and Christ in the Chalice. Jesus has a preference for people who are poor, so it makes sense that one of the greatest preachers of all time would make this connection. What brings life to this quote is the word “find”. The word find has a wide range of meanings; from - I can find a twenty-dollar bill on the sidewalk to – I found myself during the college years. In this case, finding is not by accident, it is intentional seeking. When I close my eyes and picture Jesus, the image of the last homeless man I saw does not immediately come into view. Though I do remember him. The man was holding a cardboard sign at the traffic light. There have been times, when I am more centered in my spiritual life, that seeing Jesus in others comes more readily and without too much searching. When I am closest to Christ, I can easily find him in others. And here is the paradox, it is my individual relationship with Christ that allows the scales to fall from my eyes to both see and find the beggar. The beggar, Christ and I are in a relationship which is always present and real. I can only see the Christ in beggar and Christ in the Chalice through eyes of faith. For me, Communion is the most profound way I encounter Jesus. It is tangible – I can taste and see the Lord. As I approach the altar, I can hear St. John Chrysostom telling me that I cannot find Jesus without finding the beggar. Said another way, I can find Jesus in the Chalice when I find my brother begging at the church door. From a stewardship point of view, suppose for a moment that we say - “ If you cannot find the beggar at the church door, you cannot find Christ in the offering plate”. By the way, the offering plate is where I offer myself to Christ. This creates a haunting image for me. During the church service, when I offer myself in the “offering” plate, I see that offering plate being placed on the Altar or at the foot of the Cross. And now I see Jesus taking the offering plate and placing it at the foot of the Beggar. With respect to our stewardship efforts, I have to ask, have we been spending too much time finding ways too keep the church doors open and not enough time finding the beggar at the church door?
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 13 Apr, 2023
Let’s face facts, the topic of money dominates most church council meetings. “How many fundraising activities will it take to balance the budget this year?”, or “How much money can we withdraw from church investment accounts?” are typical discussion starters. Suppose for a moment that a new whiz-bang stewardship program unlocked our wallets, and the money overflowed our cups. Imagine for a minute that you have more than enough money. All the bills are paid and you even included a handsome raise for the staff this year. What then? I’m not sure if we would know where to begin to answer this question. I can imagine the person who might have worked on the mission statement back in 2003 dusting it off and proclaiming, “I knew this would come in handy someday!”, while the mission committee folks would be busy identifying mission trips. The trustees would be making to-do lists as excitedly as school kids writing letters to Santa, and the treasurer could get his first good night’s sleep in years (not to mention dropping Tylenol and Maalox from his daily routine). The Pastor would be a rock star with her DS, while colleagues are calling for advice, and a tall steeple church is certainly in her future. But the question still lingers like a nagging conscience – “What then?” We are celebrating the Easter season, basking in the resurrection glow. Maybe we had thought our church movement was over. We huddled up in our conference room deciding the best way to walk away, all the while heartbroken over what could have been, but we just ran out of money and energy. But then suddenly Jesus appears to us, first saying, “Peace be with you”, and then again he appears in the breaking of bread. Wait a minute! We are not done – we have all that we need – Jesus! But “What then?” “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations and baptize in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.” So, sure, waiting for enough money to balance the budget might be a good diversion for avoiding our mandate to go and make disciples. But, if we never have enough money, “What then?”
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 06 Apr, 2023
I’m an old, retired donkey (and for the record, I’ve already heard all the jokes). I used to give the kids rides when they played soldiers. Last Sunday, two guys pressed me into service to give this guy a ride into the city. He must have been important because there was a crowd of people cheering and covering the road with palms. At first, I thought they were cheering for me, after all, I was chosen among all the other donkeys. But then I got this strange sense that I knew this man on my back. Funny, as old as I am, he wasn’t heavy at all, it was like carrying a baby. A baby, that’s it! It must have been more than thirty years ago; I remember that Mary was pregnant, and Joseph was trying to find a place to stay. And then it was the long trip to Egypt and back. It’s him, I know it! I knew he was special when the angels started to sing when he was born. They called him King! Well, as we were approaching the city of Jerusalem -- call it donkey intuition, because we animals can tell when a storm is coming or even sense an earthquake before you humans feel it -- I sensed something big was happening. I was excited, worried, and peaceful all at once. I didn’t understand what was going on. After we entered the city gate, he got off my back. He looked into my eyes and scratched me behind my ears; boy, I like that! He said goodbye and I wondered if I would see him again. I couldn’t help but feel honored. I was humbled too, because as important as he must be, no one ever said thank you to me before. Who am I that I was chosen to carry the King – twice!? Then, I did meet him one more time – you see, it was me he asked to roll that the stone away.
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 30 Mar, 2023
I was reflecting on a celebration and memorial service for a dear friend. Flo lived 86 years. Underline “Lived”. Living life is an intentional action. Flo was a remarkable person who embraced those around her as her own family. Somehow, she managed to knead humor and compassion into her version of the bread of life that she served at her table. Growing up during the great depression, she and her family were poor. At the service it was said by a cousin that she did not dream of a life she did not have, rather she invested in her own. Powerful. Flo somehow dodged the human tendency to compare, envy and covet. She was given a gift and she treasured it, loved it, and invested in her life every day. What a great Lenten lesson: invest in your life. Of course this sounds simple. Not so easy though, because before I can invest in my life, I have to know myself. That takes work, maybe painful work. It begins with silence, prayer and a focus on the Creator and Giver of life. Because I am made in the image and likeness of God, self-knowledge is connecting, being one, with my Lord. I have to see God in order to see myself, my real self-image. Deepening my relationship with Jesus is investing my life. I am intrigued by this spiritual financial language. Saving and spending take on new meaning in this spiritual context. The words wealth, rich, bankrupt, debt and divestment have a new power when they are seen through a spiritual lens. In this spiritual framework, investing in my life is really a matter of stewardship. Will I act out of fear and hide my life under a rock, squandering the love poured into me, or will I take some risk, and invest my life, multiplying the generosity of Jesus within me. Thank you, Flo, I’m sure the words “Well Done” are yours to hear.
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 23 Mar, 2023
During my adult life I have experienced 3 major banking crises. The first dates back to the Savings & Loan crash of 1987. The second was the credit default fiasco of 2008-9 that crushed the Lehman Brothers firm and also tanked the S&P 500 by -49.9%. Now we have the Silicon Valley Bank (SVB), Signature Bank, and Credit Suisse sending shock waves throughout the banking system. All three crises, it seems to me, have some degree of moral hazard. Wikipedia defines economic moral hazard as: “In economics a moral hazard is a situation where an economic actor has an incentive to increase its exposure to risk because it does not bear the full cost of that risk. For example, when a corporation is insured it may take on higher risk knowing that its insurance will pay the associated cost.” Sometimes the tax law and public policies provide the incentive to take on risk. This was especially true leading up to the near depression of 2008-9. To help expand homeownership in poorer neighborhoods, loan underwriting standards were relaxed. Previously, borrowers would have to put down 30% or more of the purchase price in order to have a no (doc) documentation loan. This means that neither their income, assets, nor employment would be verified by the bank. Suddenly, anyone could get a no-doc loan, and in some neighborhoods, loans were being pushed and sold at an alarming rate. Couple this with very low mortgage interest rates for the first couple years, and people who should have never been approved for a loan were on the short end of the moral hazard stick. Indeed, many lost their homes. The banking community called these loans sub-prime because they were obviously riskier. Some bright person came up with the idea of selling credit default swaps to insure sub-prime loans against default so that they could be sold to pension funds and such. Possibly a good idea, except the insurance company was not funding this liability. This was moral hazard on steroids. It the past 3 years a couple trillion bucks have been printed, just because we can, causing steep inflation. Today, banks have investments in bonds that pay the bank 3%, whilst paying out 4.5% on CDs to customers – not sustainable. Some banks took on more risk, such SVB, and got caught with their financial trousers down. There is a lot more to the story, but let’s say moral hazard was front and center. I am persuaded that by bailing out the banks we absolved the bank board and executives, as well as investors from taking too much risk, and acting imprudently. If you had a million in cash, would you place it all in one local bank where only $250,000 is insured? Or would you act prudently, and place it in four or more banks to protect your nest egg? The Federal Reserve just made all the depositors at SVB whole, disregarding the FDIC 250K limit. Many see this as incentivizing moral risk and rewarding poor investment choices. At some point the Government will not be able to bailout all the banks. It might be time to let the free market correct and change bad behavior. It often takes pain to change. In the meantime, it would be good to teach bankers and investors about John Wesley’s theology of money. The center of his teaching is not taking advantage of customers and competitors, and doing no harm. These are the virtues that need to be lifted up and put into practice as the antidote to moral hazard. Capitalism, as Jefferson noted, requires a moral people.
By David Abbott / Director of Stewardship 21 Mar, 2023
Each morning, the New England Annual Conference sends out a prayer. On Monday March 20, 2023 - the first day of Spring, Bishop Johnson's prayer (see below) was shared. It appears to be based on Ezekiel 37 and the valley of the dry bones. As I read it, I also envisioned the words as a sign of new life for all congregations. That's not to mean that suddenly money and attendance woes will be gone. Rather as we witness new life in nature, as faith communities we might pray this prayer for our congregation and its ministry in, and with, the world around us. As we strive to survive, can we be open to new realities, even if they are not the ones we yearn for or remember? As we worry about what is supposed to be right or wrong, can we put down our weapons of separation, exclusion, and hate and prepare to love, and be loved by, those who don't agree with us? As we consider the words of the prayer, let us by begin by asking the Holy Spirit to breathe into each of us. To breathe hope, love, grace, mercy, and gratitude that we might exhale and live those very things in our moment by moment lives. BISHOP JOHNSON'S PRAYER: Lord, our bones are dry and windswept. We thirst for new life, a sip of living water. We await a fresh moving of your Holy Spirit, a stirring of new vitality, A refreshed vision that opens our souls for new realities. Our bones are scattered. speak and draw us together. The old has passed away, cover us with new flesh, new life and new possibilities. Let us move from the battles of the past to dwell in Eden. Free us from our warring so we might enter your new Jerusalem, the city of peace. Only you, O Lord can do this, may these bones live again. Amen.
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 16 Mar, 2023
The task of a fundraiser is to connect the donor with the mission of the organization. The fundraiser knows the more I’m connected, through annual giving and volunteering, the better chance of a larger major gift down the road. And, if I’ve given annually for several years, even small amounts, there is a chance of a bequest to the organization - if I’m asked. All this is true for the church as well. Fundraising principles and techniques work wherever they are implemented. However, if all the church does is fundraise, it misses the essence of the “ask”. If fundraising is the task, the church will raise money for the budget, just like any other not-for-profit. That is wonderful if that’s all we are called to be, just another not-for-profit. Now, don’t get me wrong, fundraising is a noble profession. Raising money to find a cure of a disease, provide a scholarship, feed the poor, care for the sick, impacts both the giver and the recipient of the gift. But in the church we are called to be faith-raisers as well as fundraisers. Within the church, the Body of Christ, we faith-raisers need to connect the disciple to Jesus through his or her wallet. If we are not asking, “How does your gift bring you closer to Jesus?”, we have not only missed the point, we have done spiritual harm. By not connecting the faith & money dots, we allow the people in the pews to go on thinking that their money is all theirs, and that they obtained their wealth all by themselves. We allow the idol of money to have power over their lives, where the drive to gather more stuff, even to the point of being in debt, places them in bondage. What makes the church different from every other not-for profit isn’t a “what”, but a Who: Jesus. There are approximately 1.3 million not-for-profits in the United States. When we fail to make the faith-money connection, we reduce the church to being just one of many not-for-profit organizations making the case for support. The case we are making is for a transformed life in Christ.
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 09 Mar, 2023
At church during prayer time, someone asked for prayers for a person with a heart blockage. As usual my mind went off in another direction. A blockage in the heart is serious business. I wondered if the person had a family history of heart issues and inherited the problem. Was it caused by a poor diet and lack of exercise? Knowing why does not help the person, but it gives me a sense of order. Soon my line of thinking went to the spiritual realm. St Paul said, “…because if you confess with your lips and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved”. What are the spiritual heart blockages that would prevent me from confessing with my lips? My pride would cause a blockage to Christ in my heart. Self-centeredness could cause a major blockage. Maybe I inherited an agnostic disposition from parents that shunned all things of religion. Some of the spiritual blockages mirror the physical clogs, in that they build up over time. St. Augustine said to God, “You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You”. Pascal, reflecting on this idea described a God hole: “What else does this craving, and this helplessness, proclaim but that there was once in man a true happiness, of which all that now remains is the empty print and trace? This he tries in vain to fill with everything around him, seeking in things that are not there the help he cannot find in those that are, though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite and immutable object; in other words by God himself”. Decades of filling our God hole with addictions and other pleasure-seeking endeavors, creates life-threatening heart blockages. But there is hope; a diet rich in God’s Word, a disciplined prayer life, personal confession, and regularly partaking in Holy Communion, can clear the blockage. Sometimes the blockage needs to be opened with a spiritual stent. This can be done by attending a retreat like Walk to Emmaus or Cursillo. Lent is the church’s prescription to clearing heart blockages through the spiritual disciplines of prayer, fasting, and alms giving. In my work at the Foundation I have often been asked how to increase giving, and how to increase church attendance. The question could be restated: What are the spiritual heart blockages, those obstacles to increasing both our giving and church attendance? I think the answer is not opening our wallet wider, rather it is helping people fill their God hole with Jesus.
By Gary Melville / Director of Development 02 Mar, 2023
Stories abound about the advisor, (attorney, planner, CPA, insurance broker) who for years worked closely with a business owner, usually a man, and neglected the family because they were not the decision makers. The business relationship grew and matured while the wealth was being created through a small business. And often times, the business grew because a trusted, highly skilled, and trained advisor sat across the table. For years, there were business needs: the tax laws changed, insurance plans re-written, estate plans updated, investment opportunities captured, and all the while, there was the advisor, listening and proposing. The succession plans were in place: buy/sell agreements, some funded, some insured, all carefully crafted. Then it happens; a death, or retirement. The transition plan works like it was designed by the man and the advisor. Some small hitches but otherwise textbook smooth. The next chapter of this book isn’t such a good read. The wife that was never invited to the planning meeting, the dinner, the golf tournament, or the day of sailing is now in charge. Seven years ago she was invited to be on the hospital board where she established relationships with other highly skilled advisors, all who valued her opinion and viewed her as a peer. Halfway through reading this story you can see how this chapter ends. Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse, the son calls; you know, the one who has been groomed to take over the business. Suddenly the advisor realizes that he was never invited to play golf either. So between mom and the son they have a new team of trusted advisors, who share their interests, and value them as people, not just business transactions. Why do we share this with you today? While it is true that there is an art to developing relationships beyond the decision maker, sometimes it just boils down to having common courtesy and common sense. At the Foundation, we are not only skilled gift planners, we value, understand, and appreciate family dynamics. We approach our work through the lens of a financial ministry, the individual and family are, and always will be, top of mind. We believe we are called to serve, and serve with, you. We believe that each relationship is a gift from God, a blessing to us as a Foundation and as individuals. We'd love to hear your story and that of your entire family or faith community. How can we help you today? How can we begin, or continue, to build our relationship with you and those whom you love and care for?
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